If there is ever a name you hate more than you choose to, does it come out of a feeling of intense anger in your heart? But then why would someone hate a name? It sounds more logical to hate the person. But would you want to kiss the person whose name you hate? Would anybody want to kiss the person whose name they hate? Ahh... what a silly question to ask eh? But what do you call a woman who so intensely loves a man that she cannot tolerate to hear his name. Would you say her love is incomplete or would you suggest she remains to mature in her thoughts, or better still would you suggest she better go to a psychiatrist?

The subject of the talk has to be decided. Is it the name that she hates? Or is it the nature of her feeling? Well, let us first deal with the nature of her feeling. How does she love this man? She in fact does not know for sure whether at all what she feels is love. She once heard someone say he was keen on photography. After two years she saw an orchard of barren apple trees one fine morning after a freezing rain in January, the trees were all white – as though they were dipped like the sausages in white coloured ketchup and made to stand again. They looked like the silver trees of heaven. Ahh....she thought I wish you were here. Thankfully nobody around her knew who she was thinking about. And she felt his whispers in her ear: “Do you really think I’m not here?” Flustered, she suspiciously glanced on either side, pulled her hood and walked away.

.....He once kissed her. It was a kiss probably. Probably? She thought for days about it, and then came to her conclusion: yes, it was a kiss for 5 seconds. She had turned to say goodbye and they hugged, she had looked up and felt his lips on hers ...1...2...3..4..5. And that was it. Even a mosquito lingered longer than this to meet his nutritional needs. She felt herself floating in air. There were these intermittent phases of despair when she thought did he even realise that they had kissed? But those thoughts didn’t matter. As long as she had him by her side, nothing mattered. And the best part in this case was he didn’t even know he was by her side! What else could she ask for?

Oh we were talking of a name she hated and was trying to decide about the nature of her feeling.....well, it doesn’t really matter, does it? There are so many other things to talk about.